Step Three: Have Compassion for Yourself and your Partner

As you notice your breath, ask yourself,

“What’s happening to me right now?”

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Be aware of your thoughts, feelings, and any impulsive urges to lash out.

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Allow time to feel your anger and hurt.

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Soothe and nurture yourself.

This calms your heart.

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Appreciate, validate and support yourself this very moment, even in areas where you need to change.

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Have compassion for yourself for the times you’ve hurt your partner.

You will be less judgmental and gain perspective.

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Self-compassion is the first step toward compassion for your partner.

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Put yourself in your partner’s shoes.

Imagine your partner’s experience.

This will soften you to respond with greater compassion.

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Compassion lies at the heart

of your relationship.

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Compassion never means tolerating verbal or physical abuse.

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